Have I got a story for you!

gossip

(image from joyfulheart.com)

“Hey did you hear about Bob falling off the wagon again?”
“I can’t believe that Angelina would do that to Brad.”
“I hear that Phil is getting a face lift.”
“I think Susan gambled away her paycheck.”

Salacious statements all. It’s the kind of gossip that keeps the television shows like TMZ and Inside Hollywood in business and making money. I think there is no doubt that there is a segment of the population that thrives on hearing about the miscues and embarrassing moments of others. Maybe it’s because it makes us feel better about ourselves.

It’s a “this high and mighty person can’t stay in a relationship, but I’ve been married for 15 years so I’m better than them” type of thinking. And I suppose that it does fill a need for some people. The unfortunate side effect however, is that people bring that type of thinking into the workplace and apply it towards their co-workers, or unbelievably use it against their friends! I believe this is an unacceptable behavior.

Look at yourself. Unless you are one of those rare individuals that have it all: a loving family, great friends, a great career, boat loads of money and no other vices; you probably have some less than desirable issues going on in your own life. It may be family issues, it may be work problems, it may be money problems; whatever it is, you are probably working through something. You are also probably fairly careful about who you discuss those issues with.

Maybe because you just feel it is private, maybe you feel that it is embarrassing or maybe you just don’t want to share. Whatever your reason, if you have chosen to keep the information private, I am going to guess that you would be less than pleased to find out your office coworkers were discussing your private issue amongst themselves.

I am asking each of you to reflect on the type of gossip that you talk about in your lives and in each instance, turn the tables. If you were in that position, would you want others talking about it. My guess is, for the majority of you, the answer would be no. If you feel the need to get involved I am asking you to approach the whole situation differently. If you know (or “hear”) that someone is having a problem of any sort just let them know you are there for them if they need to talk. Instead of destroying someone’s trust and confidence in you (which WILL happen if they find out you are gossiping about them) you can strengthen that trust and confidence.

Take proactive measures to make your friends and coworkers feel confident in you. That you are there, if the need arises that they need someone to talk to. Conversely, if you need someone to talk to, you will know who you can trust and who you can’t.

Let me know your thoughts. You can trust me.